Paradise Lost
by JasperSAYSrelax128
Summary: Sequel to My Black Dahlia. Bella has been broken, hurt, pained, lied to...but now, she’s trapped. As a result of her transformation being corrupted by an unknown source, Bella’s powers were catapulted into chaos—trapping her in mirrors.FULL SUMMARY INSIDE
1. Summary

**Summary**

Sequel to My Black Dahlia. Bella has been broken, hurt, pained, lied to....but now, she's trapped. A combination of drugs, a faint heart, and a transformation gone wrong, she is a different kind of vampire—the kind that still lives, breathes, and can be hurt. As a result of her transformation being corrupted by an unknown source, Bella's powers were catapulted into chaos—trapping her in the thin world between mirrors. In an attempt to set her free, Edward and the Cullens travel to the ends of the earth searching for what put her there—A power so great it can kill anything, a killer feared by even the Volturi, a monster that takes what he wants at all costs....what everyone thought was a myth.

Until now.

.

P_

PA_

PAR_

PARA_

PARAD_

PARADI_

PARADIS_

PARADISE_

PARADISE L_

PARADISE LO_

PARADISE LOS_

PARADISE LOST._


	2. Prologue

**Prologue**

_He may be cold,_

_He may be blood thirsty,_

_He may be everything you're told._

_He may be invincible,_

_Invisible,_

_And destroy everything you hold._

_He may be beautiful,_

_Seem wonderful,_

_And give you every soul._

_But don't fall prey,_

_And to this day,_

_You'll never wonder what he stole._

_But watch your back,_

_Don't go back,_

_Don't take him for a fool._

_He looks vampire,_

_But has desire,_

_To see your soul in full._

_He is not from this world, you see,_

_But a haven from below._

_So listen hear my friend, to me,_

_He is a wave on but a row._

**Like my Poem? Please review.**


	3. Prologue 2

Prologue 2

**3****rd**** Person POV**

SEVEN_

SEVEN DAYS_

SEVEN DAYS EARLIER_

.

O N C E Y O U L O O K I N T O T H E D A R K, I T L O O K S B A C K.

"That was great!" Rebecca sang as the three 18 year old girls walked into Samantha's home. Their words were slightly slurred as they staggered up the staircase, drunk. Samantha's parents were away on vacation, leaving the huge mansion to her and her sister.

"I know, you should have seen his face!" Samantha chided, giggling. Samantha lead the way down the hallway towards her room, when she stopped. She stopped so suddenly, that Rebecca and Tilly ran into her, stumbling to the ground.

"Ow!" they giggled, trying to pick themselves up. Samantha, ignoring her immature friends, sauntered into the room of her 16 year old sister, Danny. Danny, completely oblivious to her sister, continued to work at her desk, shining what looked like a board.

"Hey, little sister!" Samantha chimed, startling Danny, causing her to jump.

"God, don't do that!" Danny said, putting her hand to her heart.

"Watcha doin'?" Samantha teased. "What's _this?"_ she spat, picking up the board between her fingers, raising it above Danny's head.

"What the hell! Give it back! You'll break it!" Danny yelled as she jumped, reaching out for the board.

"It's a _Ouija Board!"_ Tilly and Rebecca chorused, staring at the board. (Not know what a Ouija board is? Go to bottom AN). A sly look entered Samantha's eyes, a look that had shivers running down Danny's spine.

"Gee, thanks, Danz. What a lovely present." Samantha smirked as she headed towards the door with the board. Danny launched herself at Samantha.

"No! That's mine! It's a rare one, you'll break it!" she yelled, trying to reach for the board. Samantha's smile grew ten-fold, while Tilly and Rebecca exchanged a a smug look.

"Well, then, you'll just have to play along with us so we don't break it." Samantha said, slyly. Danny's eyes widened and she shrunk back. Danny had always been fascinated with the 'talking boards', but never, ever, has she used one. In truth, she was afraid to. After all, contacting spirits was no walk in the park. With spirits comes good...and dark. Through a Ouija board, the spirits talk to you. It's a portal from their realm to ours. But connecting to that realm is dangerous, and once a spirit speaks with you....it may never leave.

"Aww, is wittle Danny scwared?" Rebecca chided, smirking. As Danny stared at Rebecca's amusement, her jaw set in. Angrily, she stalked past Samantha, grabbing a hold of the board, and walking towards Samantha's room.

Samantha, Tilly, and Rebecca smiled victoriously as they followed after.

The four girls set the Ouija Board down on the floor in the middle of the room, and turned all of the lights off, except for a candle to keep some light on the board. Samantha set the planchette in the middle of the board, with her finger lightly touching it. The others followed suit, lightly placing a finger on top of the heart shaped arrow pointer, all except for Danny. Danny stared at the board reluctantly, while the other girls glared at her expectantly. Finally, she gave in, and slowly placed a finger on the planchette.

Samantha glided the planchette around in a circle across the board three times before she rested it in the middle again. Samantha cleared her throat before speaking, and letting her mind and body open to whatever may lay out there.

"Is anyone here?" she asked clearly. The girls sat in silence as they stared at each other's faces and back down at the planchette, waiting for something to happen. Nothing happened.

"Maybe we—"

Tilly was cut off as suddenly, the planchette started moving slowly, inching across the board. The girls gasped in shock as the planchette moved faster, them barely touching it as the arrow pointed to 'YES'.

Danny's eyes were wide and she was shaking slightly as she stared at the bold letters. Then, the planchette moved back to the center. Samantha shook her head, coming out of her daze, as she prepared to ask another question.

"Are you a good spirit?" she asked. The girls sat in silent anticipation as they waited for the planchette to move again. After about thirty seconds, the planchette started gliding across the board, and landed, once again, on 'YES'.

The girls sighed in relief as they stared at the board. Rebecca rolled her eyes.

"I want something bad. Something scary!" Rebecca sneered as the planchette glided back towards the middle. Before Samantha could ask another question, the planchette flew across the board and landed on 'GOODBYE'.

"Now you did it. You made it leave." Tilly said, glaring at Rebecca. Danny sighed in relief, finally happy that it was over. But before she could get up, Samantha pulled her back down.

"We're doing it again." She commanded.

"Again?! We just did it and _survived_. I think that's quite an accomplishment for one day." Danny said.

"I don't care." Samantha declared, placing her hand on the planchette. Everyone followed suit, and Danny closed her eyes shut as Samantha moved the planchette around three times in a circle. When she finished, she took a deep breath.

"Is anyone here?" she asked, repeating her earlier question. The girls watched the planchette in silence. After about a minute, the planchette started inching across the board, and landed on 'YES'.

"I got a question." Rebecca declared. Everyone watched her as she took a deep breath in.

"Ohhh, great spirit........does Andrew Donovan like me?" she said, and busted up laughing.

"You idiot! You can't ask _that!"_ Tilly said, hitting Rebecca in the back of the head. Danny glared at Rebecca. Samantha carried on, ignoring them.

"Are you powerful?" Samantha asked. The planchette immediately started moving across the board slowly, until it landed on 'YES'.

"Are you....a good spirit?" Samantha asked. Everyone instinctively leaned closer to the board, the atmosphere intense as the awaited the answer. The board was silent and still for a while, until, finally, the planchette started gliding across the board, landing on 'NO'.

Everyone sat back, staring at the board with wide eyes. Danny's trembling increased to shaking.

"What do you want?" Samantha asked quietly. Everything was still. Everything was silent. The planchette moved very slowly across the board under their fingers, moving from letter to letter, spelling out its answer...'KILL'.

Suddenly, the planchette flew from their grasp, flying across the board at an alarming speed.

'KILL, KILL, KILL'. It spelled out repeatedly. 'KILL, KILL'.

Then the planchette flew from the board, falling to the ground.

They say that if the planchette leaves the board....it sets the spirits free.

Everything was quiet, everything was still, everything was nerve-wracking as the girls sat in utter silence, staring at each other in horror.

Suddenly, the candle blew out.

The girls sat in silence, afraid to move. Suddenly, the board caught on fire, lighting up the room. The girls jumped up from the ground, fleeing as the board burned. But as soon as it burned the board to nothing but ashes, the fire disappeared. The girls split up, screaming as they ran through the completely dark house. A gust of cold air wafted through the house, yet there were no windows open. Samantha screamed as she ran down the hallway, towards the top of the very high staircase. Her breathing was deep and adrenaline coursed through her veins like acid as she ran for the front door. But she never made it.

From a distance, Rebecca could hear Samantha's screams.

Rebecca hid in the deepest part of Samantha's closet as she sobbed tears of fear. She knew she had just heard her best friend die. She knew this was her fault. She knew that she was next.

"Rebecca..." a whisper in the wind chanted. The hairs on the back of Rebecca's neck stood up, and a shiver ran down her spine. But it wasn't from the cold. "Boo." A voice said, directly at her ear. Screaming, Rebecca ran from the closet, running towards the huge glass doors leading to the patio outside of Samantha's room. She ran outside, and looked below her about three stories down.

From a distance, Tilly could hear the shattering of glass and Rebecca's screams.

Tilly quickly ran down the stairs, when she tripped over something. She groaned as her body collided with the hard ground. She looked at what she tripped over, and stifled her screams. There, she saw Samantha's body—bloody and broken, her head torn off, her blood drained.

As quickly as possible, Tilly stumbled as she got to her feet and ran to the door. She pulled on the doorknob, but it was locked. Her fingers trembled and she tried to quiet her sobs as she worked with the many locks, and finally got them all unlocked. She pulled on the door again, but was stopped by the safety chain.

Tilly cried out as she felt a cold gust of wind hit her hard. Her hands shook tremendously as her fingers fiddled with the chain, but it was stuck. It wouldn't open.

"No! Please, please! Come on, please!" she begged in hysteria as she tugged on the safety chain. Finally, she got it loose. Her hand reached for the door, when suddenly, something grabbed a hold of her feet, and dragged her away from the door, screaming.

From a distance, Danny could hear every scream, every plea, every death.

And as she hid in her room, she listened as whatever it was passed by her room, leaving her to lose her sanity.

Danny could have sworn she heard a laugh.

O N C E Y O U L O O K I N T O T H E D A R K, I T L O O K S B A C K.

.

**REVIEW!**

**Ouija Board:**

**It's a board with a bunch of letters on it, along with "Yes" "No" "Goodbye" and something else, I think. I forgot. Anyways, the spirits talk through it, you ask questions and they answer by either yes, no, or spelling it out by pointing to the letters. This is dangerous because it attracts bad spirits, and they can haunt you for the rest f your life, or your house…and the board is basically a portal when you perform it. You're opening the realm up and letting spirits and stuff in. So I've heard.**

**A bunch of years ago me and my friends did it, and the board started shaking and the arrow thing was flying around the board. I ran out of her house screaming before it could spell anything.**


	4. Not the Same

Chapter 1: Not the Same

**Edward's Prologue:**

Of everything I had learned about Bella, and everything I already knew, like her caring personality, her lovely brown eyes, and her innocent appearance, there was one thing I had come to witness. No matter what Bella was, whether she appeared as she always had, she wasn't the _same._ Those brown eyes were replaced with a deep black, which tended to flash red. But no, it wasn't the color of her eyes that really mattered—it was that flash of savagery, hostility, and bloodlust that seemed to spark in those eyes. It was the dark look she now held, the temper that caused her to go off. It was the fact that she was no longer innocent....and hiding behind those eyes, was a raging monster begging to break loose.

I wasn't sure which was more frightening: Bella's raging hostility, or the monster that had caused it.

**Bella's Prologue:**

I had never felt so dead. I _was_ dead, I had died in Edward's arms. That was the best death I could have ever asked for.

To be honest, I was relieved that I was dead. As bad as it may sound, for the first time in a very long time, I felt peaceful. My body was warm and soft....and it felt like a velvety layer of cloth was draped over me. I felt content. But although I did feel content, I was missing one thing. I was missing Edward.

I didn't wish I was alive. I didn't wish to be dragged from this peaceful place. Although, I did wish he were here with me. But then again, I was dead. Wishing Edward was here with me—that was wishing that he were dead.

God, how sickly selfish can I be?

I was content right now. Edward would never be here, and that thought did give me some speck of happiness, knowing he would never die. He would live on, and have a life. I was content here in my warm bliss.

I was happy with the notion that Edward would never see me, hear me, speak to me.....love me, ever again. It was for the best, really.

I was happy with the notion that I was currently making my way to Heaven.

But, as quick as it came, my warm happiness drained, and was replaced with cold. My soul seemed to turn cold and freeze over as my body became numb. But then, the numbing was replaced—and I was not only now cold, I was in pain. It felt as though my body were on fire, and I was burning in the flickering flames of it. The fire seared through my veins, and I screamed out in agony. What was this?

This wasn't my peaceful death. This wasn't my content, warm home. I was being taken from my happiness and thrown into the fire.

"_No, please, don't take me! HELP ME!"_ I screamed at God, begging for the fire to leave me alone, and leave me to my death. This fire was worse than death. This was a nightmare. But the thing was, was that I could only think of one thing that could cause his amount of pain.....vampire venom. I was changing.

I screamed out as the fire continued to rage on, when suddenly, it increased. No, the pain wasn't the same pain increasing upon the change—it turned into a different kind of pain, the feeling that someone was ripping me from the inside out. This wasn't fire, it was merely tearing me apart. Just when I thought the pain couldn't get any worse, it had changed.

Then, it all stopped. I no longer felt warm, pained, or numbness. I felt _cold._ The thing was, I wasn't referring to my skin temperature. My _soul_ felt cold. I no longer felt like I was there, I felt like I was light. Slowly, I opened my eyes, and looked at my surroundings. I didn't know where I was. I looked around me and saw darkness. It was like a pitch black room of darkness. And although my eyesight could pick up anything in the dark, there was nothing for miles. It was liked a giant room of emptiness. In the distance I could see a triangular patch of light, illuminated the dark place I was. Carefully, I started making my way towards the light. Before I could even blink, I stood before it. It was a streetlight. It was a streetlight....but there was no street. The light flickered, and the thick fog swirled menacingly around me as I stood below the iridescent orange glow of the lamp. I didn't know where I was, but there was one thing I could conclude.

I was sure as _hell_ not in Heaven.

A dark chuckle echoed through the darkness. It was strange in the sound of it. It didn't sound right—it didn't sound _human_. It didn't sound like it was real. But I spun around, my fingers tightening into fists and my muscles recoiling, preparing for an attack. The fog continued to swirl around the streetlamp as my eyes scanned the darkness, until a waft of cold wind flew by me quickly. An inhuman growl rippled from my chest as another chuckle crept towards me.

I didn't like being played with.

There was another loud laugh, and I saw a flash of a smile through the thick fog. It definitely wasn't a human smile—there were no words to describe the grin that I saw at that moment. It was sick and masochistic. It was a grin that even a vampire wouldn't possess. It was something that made the pit of your stomach sink, and your insides scream. It was the grin of a monster.

And as I caught a glimpse of his face, I knew what this was. His thoughts flashed through my mind, waking me up to realization. And as he turned away, dissolving into the darkness, I knew what he was. He was a monster.

He was a monster exiled by the devil himself.

_Previously:_

"_I can see her in my visions." She repeated, and I turned around to face her. "She's a vampire." She said quietly. I stared at her for a while, before my eyes flashed to the mirror. Alice's next words were what sent my mind into a chaotic frenzy of right or wrong, happiness or agony, madness and calm._

"_She's trapped in the mirror."_

**NOW…..**

**Edward's POV:**

"What are you talking about?" I whispered, barely audible as I stared at Alice. My feet were frozen in place between her and the door. My emotions welled with happiness at the fact that she wasn't dead. My thoughts all encircled around one thing: Bella _alive_. But one thing downplayed those thoughts, those feelings—the fact that Alice had just said that Bella was trapped in a mirror. Was that even possible? And if it was....was it truly a step up from being dead?

Yes, of course it was. She still _existed._

I walked over to the mirror and pressed my hand against it, Bella's hand reaching up to where mine was. I closed my eyes as I felt the cold seeping through the mirror. Her warmth was gone—she was cold, so cold. I took a deep breath and pulled my hand away, glancing back at Alice.

"I can only tell you as much as I saw," she said, uneasy. Her eyes dropped to the ground, her thoughts swirling in circles. I tried listening into her thoughts, when, suddenly, I was hit with a mental voice that was not Alice's.

_She dies..._

_KILL, KILL, KILL._

I blinked in shock, my eyes wide as I stared at the floor. My eyes snapped up to land on Alice, who remained unmoved, thinking.

"What was that?!?!" I hissed, my eyes darting around the room, and finally landing on the mirror, where the reflection of Bella was staring at me with a crease in her brow. Alice looked at me, and frowned.

"What was what?" Alice asked, irritated that I had interrupted her thinking process.

_Her blood....tasty blood._

_KILL, KILL, KILL._

The thoughts hissed inside my mind, sending my body into a panicking frenzy. I ran over to the open window and leaned out, staring intensely into the depths of the woods. My eyesight furthered beyond the first line of trees, across the whispering brook, past the willowing leaves and landed on the small humming bird fluttering from flower to beautiful flower. It was the only sign of life I could pick up for miles.

The forest was as empty as a dry lake. It was far too empty.

"What _is_ it?!" Alice hissed, her irritation growing. If Jasper were here, he'd be rigid by now. He was out hunting with the others. And, apparently, I was the only one who could hear the voice. I tried listening into Alice's thoughts again, but was hit with the same voice.

_Illusion, illusion, illusion....blood, blood, blood..._

"I hear a voice....but no one's here. Every time I try and listen in to your thoughts, I hear it." I said, and then the most surprising thing happened, sending my body into shock.

Bella's expression snapped.

I had never seen anything look so frightened before. She started fluttering around the mirror, before she disappeared completely.

"_Bella!"_ I screamed. Then, she appeared in the mirror across the room. I ran to it, but before I could reach it, she disappeared again.

"Edward!" Alice called, pointing to the hallway, where Bella's reflection was in the mirror on the wall next to the stairs. I ran to it, but before I could reach it, she disappeared, appearing in the reflection of the glass wall at the bottom of the stairs.

She was leading us somewhere.

I ran after her to the door, when, suddenly, the television switched on. I stopped dead in my tracks as white noise hissed through the room, before the screen flashed to a news channel. I stared at the bold letters across the screen:

_THREE GIRLS MURDERED BY CRAZY SISTER._

"..._..the three girls came home to Samantha Cowles' mansion in Los Gatos, California, from a night of partying while Samantha's parents were out of town. But what awaited for them at home was surely not what they expected, as they were attacked and savagely massacred by Samantha's younger sister, Danny Cowles, who supposed went insane."_

Then, the screen cut off and went to a fuzzy black and white picture while white noise blasted through the room, before the screen went completely blank. Then three large words flashed across the screen. Bella's reflection flashed with fury, her eyes darkening to sea black and her teeth barred, before she raised her hand towards the TV, and the TV exploded into millions of sparks and pieces. The pieces burned around us as I stood there, frozen in shock, still staring at where the TV once stood, while Alice hurried to get the fire extinguisher. She returned with the red canister and squeezed the end of the hose, and white foam and mist fluttered around the room, before there was nothing left of the TV but charred black remains.

The last three words flashed through my mind repeatedly.

_KILL, KILL, KILL._

**Been wondering where I've been?....**

I've been gone for a week. Well, I just travelled to San Diego(I live in California) for the 87th ARBA rabbit showing Convention! There were over 30,000 rabbits shown in around 50 or so breeds, and I am happy to report that of the 9 rabbits I showed, I won Best of Breed and Reserve for the American Fuzzy Lop! This is my second year winning Best of Breed in a row at the National Convention. Lat year it was at Louisville, Kentucky. Next year I will be travelling to Minneapolis!


	5. You Can't Take Me

OH MAI GAWSH! LOOK AT THE LITTLE TINY POND WITH THE LITTLE TINY…..BOULDERS!!

Chapter 2: You Can't Take Me

**3****rd**** Person POV:**

Crickets chirped quietly in the darkness of the neighborhood as the young women, in her early twenties, jogged with her dog's leash in hand and her headphones in her ears. It was extremely cold tonight, and the women's deep breathing created thick, chilly fog in front of her as she ran. Her beautiful golden retriever padded alongside of her happily, enjoying the exercise with his owner.

The women ran on the dark sidewalk, which was obscured by over-grown plants and trees. A few dimly lit streetlamps dotted the street, their iridescent glow flickering. The street was eerily empty of cars and people, and seemed to be missing life in general. The crickets died down until there was no sound other than the women's tennis shoes scuttling against the pavement, and the tinkling of her dog's collar tags. She continued to jog silently with her dog, oblivious to the stillness of the night.

From above her, the streetlamp burned out.

The women looked up, startled, and flinched away from the chilly, dark fog that now surrounded her. Her golden retriever padded up to the large tree near them, and started sniffing the scarred base of the trunk. The dog tensed.

The women pulled on the leash of her dog, but his muscles tightened, remaining frozen in position. She let out a whistle, trying to get his attention, but he continued to sniff the tree.

"Here, boy," she called, tugging on his leash harder. Then, his lips pulled back over his barred teeth, and growls erupted from his chest as he looked up into the chaotic mess of branches owned by the tree. He barked furiously into the darkness, without warning. The women hesitantly approached the tree, and stood directly under its branches as she looked up into the dark, shadowy leaves.

The wind seemed to stop moving.

She squinted her eyes as she looked up into the tree, searching for any sign of movement or life. What she didn't expect to find was two iridescent green eyes staring back at her.

The dog continued to growl and bark as a savage hiss was heard, before something emerged from the shadows, and as quick as a striking snake, bit the women's neck.

Her screams went unheard as, not only her blood was drained from her body, but here soul as well.

**Edward's POV:**

"What the hell was that, Bella?! I paid a shit load of money for that TV! Emmett's going to have a cow!" Alice lectured, glaring at the mirror where Bella stood. I stared into the depths of Bella's eyes as she stood in a powerful stance.

That was the first time I noticed it.

Bella's entire demeanor seemed to change—to darken. The way she held herself presented itself in a powerful manor, a lustful manor. Even in these times, I couldn't help but find her intriguing, intoxicating. Just the thought of having her drove me wild. The look in her eyes flashed viciously, a hidden emotion making itself present for a fraction of the moment. That moment was short enough for me to notice, but not recognize what it was.

I watched with curious eyes as Bella's muscles recoiled, preparing for an attack as Alice continued to rant on about the TV, completely oblivious to Bella's change. But then, her muscles loosened, and her posture evened out, becoming lighter. Her eyes dimmed down, returning to their usual appearance as Alice finished her rant, her hands on her hips, glaring at Bella in the mirror. Bella now looked innocent, and even sheepish that she had destroyed the TV....however she had done it.

"Wait, Alice, how is any of this possible? And can she talk?" I asked, stepping closer to the mirror. I watched Bella intensely, looking for any sign that that flash of integrity would return. She only returned my anxious glance.

..._It's complicated..._

Alice's thoughts broke through my own.

"What do you mean complicated? _Un-complicate it!"_ I snapped, my temper reaching new heights as I stood in front of my sister, a menacing size compared to her petite frame. I heard a dull thudding, and looked over to the mirror where Bella stood, pounding her tiny fists against the glass, her mouth opening and closing furiously. Trying to tell me to cut it out, I presumed.

"She can't speak to us..." Alice started. "She can _do_ things though. It's hard to explain. She's a vampire....partially." Alice said, and I stared at her in utter shock.

"What do you mean....partially?"

"I don't know how to....tell you this, Edward," she whispered, her eyes darting back towards Bella, who was staring off into the distance with an expression of indifference on her beautiful features. I tried picking my way through Alice's mind, but she was keeping something from me. All of her focus was on Bella.

"She's not exactly....alive."

The words left Alice's mouth like a tumbling rock off of a cliff....hard and painful. It took me a few moments to fully grasp the meaning behind Alice's words, to comprehend them. I looked back at the mirror where Bella had not moved, she was still staring off at something in the distance with a blank look on her face, void of all emotion.

"What are you talking about? She's hear, she's alive!" I said, running over to the mirror and pointing at her form.

"Edward, no." Alice said softly, putting my hand down. The vision finally flashed through her mind, breaking down all of the barriers she had worked to keep up. The vision flashed through my own mind, sending my breathing into a frenzy as it played out before my eyes....everything that had happened.

_See what I mean, Edward? I'm sorry, but you needed to see it..._

"She's still partially human, in a way. She can be hurt, she has blood, she has penetrable skin...." Alice broke off, revisiting the vision again. I flinched. She looked back at me, and then Bella's distant expression as she said:

"Edward, she's a spirit, she has no physical form."

**I know you're confused, but it will all make sense soon. Just try to keep up with me. Basically she is all of those things Alice listed, but right now she is in a spirit form.**


	6. For Your Delight

For your Delight

Hey guys, I have decided to write my own "Book" to publish on HERE. This is the second book I'm writing, but I wanted to write this as a "thank you" to all of my readers. It's on my profile, it's called "Diaries of a Phoenix" and if you like Twilight you'll like this.

Happy New Year :]


	7. I'm back

Hey Fanfiction…..I'm back. I know it's been a year since I've written but you wouldn't believe what I've been through. I'm going to start writing everything again…but first, I owe it to myself, and you guys to write this one story and finish it before I continue any of my other stories. If you have ever liked any of my stories, please I beg you show me the respect to read this story. It's about me and what I've been through. It would mean the world to me.

Please Don't Hurt Me by: Jennifer Lynn Henderson. "Jen"

I was gonna start this off "I never meant to fall in love", but really, the truth is I meant to, but never thought I actually would.

And no, I don't mean the middle school teeny bopper "OHHH I LOOOVEE YOUUU" boyfriend girlfriend love, I mean the serious commitment, the bond of being in love. Something none of the books, none of the movies or plays or shows or stories have ever done justice.

Fuck I've doused myself up with drugs, hurt myself over and over, physically abused myself and other people… I've tried everything I can to forget this love. This love is so strong it shakes me, it tortures me, it won't ever let me forget, no matter how hard I try or what I do. This is a type of love you won't find everywhere, something that will never leave you. It was the best thing of my life to feel it. Now it's become the worst thing I'm trying to forget. It haunts me. Because of this I will never be the same, never walk through the world with the same head on my shoulders, I will never have hope of finding another.

This is my fucking story…what I've been through this past year, and what I'm trying to face to this day. It may not end well.


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